I know it's Easter but I'm not a religious guy, So here's a few that may ma ke you laugh during this difficult time. . A teacher asks her class: ?If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?? She calls on little Johnny. He replies, ?None, they'd all fly away with the first gun shot? The teacher replies: ?The correct answer is 4 birds, but I like th e way you're thinking.?
Then Little Johnny says, "Teacher, can I ask you a question?" The teacher s ays" Why of course". "Ok, there are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is licking the sides of a triple scoop ice cream cone. The s econd is licking around the top of the ice-cream. and the third is biting t he top of the ice cream. Which one is married??
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied: ?Well uhhhh ummm I don 't know but I suppose it could be the one that's licking around the top?
To which Little Johnny replied: ?The correct answer is the one with the wedding ring on, but I like the way you're thinking.?
A Polish guy goes into his optometrist for an eye test. The Doctor says, "c an you tell me what the third line on the chart says?" The Polish guy says "Why of course I can."
"I know that guy personally."
Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day. The teacher sees Molly is asl eep and asks her a question, ?Molly, who created Heaven and Earth? ?
Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil. ?God Almighty!? shouts Molly. ?Correct,? says the teacher.
The next day, the teacher sees Molly is asleep again. This time the teacher asks her, ? Molly, what did Eve say to Adam a bout having children? Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and Molly yells ?If you sti ck that thing in me one more time I?m going to break it off and sho ve it up your ass.!?