Yes! I had this exact problem. This was a major scourge for me. The trick is that you need to disable sysopt connect permit-ipsec and then use regular access lists.
First, make sure your match address in the crypto map includes the 5.0 to 3.0 acl and visa versa on the remote firewall
Then you have the problem that people in your DMZ on the 3.0 network can access your inside on the 5.0 network (you probably dont want that, as I didn't). This is where you disable the bypass of ACL checks for vpn traffic (no sysopt connection permit-ipsec) and then use regular ACL rules:
setup your networks in object groups and use the following:
Firewall 1 (5.0 inside)
no sysopt connection permit-ipsec
access-list from_outside extended deny ip object-group remote_dmz object-group local_inside access-list from_outside extended permit ip object-group remote_inside object-group local_inside
Firewall 2 (1.0 inside, 3.0 DMZ)
no sysopt connection permit-ipsec
access-list from_outside extended permit ip object-group remote_inside object-group local_dmz access-list from_outside extended permit ip object-group remote_inside object-group local_inside