"We describe an experiment in which a Giant African Snail, acting as a data transfer agent, exceeded all known ?lastmile? communications technologies in terms of bit-per-second performance, adding to the many paradoxes of broadband communications. We discuss the unique motivational and guidance systems necessary to facilitate snail-based data transport, and observe with satisfaction that in a society that worships the fittest, fastest, and furtherest, the meek and the slow can sometimes outperform all known competitors, giving rise to the new and exciting field of sluggish data networks."
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