The Risks of Parenting While Plugged In
By JULIE SCELFO June 9, 2010
WHILE waiting for an elevator at the Fair Oaks Mall near her home in Virginia recently, Janice Im, who works in early-childhood development, witnessed a troubling incident between a young boy and his mother.
The boy, who Ms. Im estimates was about 2 1/2 years old, made repeated attempts to talk to his mother, but she wouldn't look up from her BlackBerry. "He's like: 'Mama? Mama? Mama?' " Ms. Im recalled. "And then he starts tapping her leg. And she goes: 'Just wait a second. Just wait a second.' "
Finally, he was so frustrated, Ms. Im said, that "he goes, 'Ahhh!' and tries to bite her leg."
Much of the concern about cellphones and instant messaging and Twitter has been focused on how children who incessantly use the technology are affected by it. But parents' use of such technology - and its effect on their offspring - is now becoming an equal source of concern to some child-development researchers.
Sherry Turkle, director of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology Initiative on Technology and Self, has been studying how parental use of technology affects children and young adults. After five years and
300 interviews, she has found that feelings of hurt, jealousy and competition are widespread. Her findings will be published in "Alone Together" early next year by Basic Books.In her studies, Dr. Turkle said, "Over and over, kids raised the same three examples of feeling hurt and not wanting to show it when their mom or dad would be on their devices instead of paying attention to them: at meals, during pickup after either school or an extracurricular activity, and during sports events."
Dr. Turkle said that she recognizes the pressure adults feel to make themselves constantly available for work, but added that she believes there is a greater force compelling them to keep checking the screen.
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