Don't heistate with fire protection

About four years ago my boys became close friends with a kid they met at their tea kwon do school. They all enjoyed snowboarding (winter) and skateboarding (summer). he even became a black belt at the same time as my younger boy (15yo).

We have a very large driveway and he has some nice hills behind his house so it quickley became the norm for them to spend most of the summer at our house and most of the winter at his.

His parents are very nice folks and we visited their house along with our kids many time and vice-versa.

I noticed they had no fire protection in their very old house. I had commented to Doug many times that I could easily throw together a simple fire system from stuff I had salvaged during takeovers and tear downs but we would have to buy a few wireless smokes (four would have done it).

We both agreed it would be a good idea and I even started throwing some stuf in a box but I never got around to doing it. I had everything together and could have easily gotten a few smokes from our service department at reduced cost - but agan, I never could seem to find the time.

Saturday morning at around 4 am the house burned to the ground and my 18 year old son was the only one who didn't get out.

The other two boys in the home at the time said that when they woke up they couldn't get through the house to the room my son had gone to sleep in. It wouldn't have mattered as the investigator (who at this time is leaning towards electrical in the kitchen ceiling) believes (based on the descriptions from the those two) that since my son had his bedroom door open he was most likely already gone (from the smoke) by the time the other two woke up at the other end of the house.

Had I not screwed around and done what I knew needed doing they would have at least had a chance of waking up before it was too late and my son would still be teaching tae kwon do and going to school.

I wouldn't be sitting here waiting until Monday so they can take his body down state to be identified (he was the only other one who could have been in the house). We don't know when we will be getting him back.

If you have any family or friends who are not adequately or even rudimentarily protected don't wait. Do it today.

Don't let a loved one die because you procrastinate. Everyone is aying it was an accident and that these things happen. I know better. He is dead because I saw something that needed to be done and I simply didn't do it. It is a father's duty to protect his children.

Reply to
JoeRaisin
Loading thread data ...

My sincerest condolences on your loss, joe. You will be in our prayers.

Reply to
Tommy

Joe, My family's heart goes out to you! Having a teenager away at College, I think about it daily. So sorry for the loss of your son.... I know it sounds idiotic, but don't blame yourself. It's not up to us to determine the time or the way in which we depart. Rest assured he is indeed in a much better place. God Bless you all in this time of sorrow. Mike S.

Tommy wrote:

Reply to
secure15

Sorry Joe, my sympathies to you. It is never easy to lose a someone especially your child.

Reply to
Sean

Joe,

You and your family are in our prayers. Please don't be too hard on yourself. It will only lead you into depression and right now your family needs you to be strong.

Reply to
Robert L Bass

It is not natural for a parent to bury a child and no one that hasn't lost a child can know what you're going through now. In carefully examining every link in the chain that brought this about you may feel their was something you didn't do to prevent it. In the end that is something you can only wonder about because you can not know for certain that your efforts would have stopped any of it. I hope in time that your pain will ease and that you will have no blame to carry with you. 'It is a father's duty to protect his children.' And I believe your family needs you now more than ever.

Reply to
Roland Moore

Dear Joe,

Please accept my heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

Don't take the blame for this my friend, it's not your fault. God takes his children on His terms and we simply can't comprehend why. We can have faith that God knows best, though. Isaiah 55:8-9, "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, says the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts."

Try to stay strong in the wake of this tragedy. Know that your eldest is in a better place, and now your youngest needs you. I will keep your family in my prayers.

-Graham

Reply to
G. Morgan

You can't and shouldn't blame yourself. It wasn't your responsibility to install smoke detectors in the house in the first place. I do agree that every parent has the responsibility to ensure their children's safety but there are times when they will be away from that protection and their only "shield" will be what you've taught them to watch out for. You can't go around blaming yourself for what happened even though I know you will. All of us can relate to what you've posted here in some small way (and I don't wish to appear to diminish what you're going through). We all know of customers that have opted NOT to include smoke alarms or a carbon monoxide detector in their alarm installations. You have to realize that it's *their* decision and that you aren't obligated to include it "free" out of "moral conscience" or feelings of guilt that might be engendered when we read of such a tragic accident as what befell your son (and family). Joe. It *is* an accident. You might think it could have been avoided, but you really don't know that for sure. For what it's worth, you could have supplied them with any number of wireless smoke alarms but what if the homeowner never changed the batteries (or ignored the low battery signal)? Please don't blame yourself. Please forgive yourself. Take care and God Bless! My prayers are with you and your family.

Reply to
Frank Olson

The words people have used in response to your message are every bit as important as what you've said here. We are responsible for our children for as long as they live with us. My wife and I have raised our two sons with but one thought in mind. At some point they will find their own path and follow it where-ever it may lead. You can't always hold their hands and you have to hope that messages like this will open their eyes to the hazards that surround them, and keep them safe. You can't blame yourself for what happened. It's only natural to question what you've done (and what you could have done) after something like this happens. It's hard to let go of that parental responsibility but rest assured, the blame is not yours. It's not even with the family whose house it was. God Bless and Keep you.

Reply to
FIRETEK

My sincerest condolences,Joe

Don't blame yourself,Only God decide when he recall one of us.. You need to be strong in those hard days,the rest of your family need you My prayer's will be for you and your family..

"JoeRaisin" a écrit dans le message de news:

8rSeh.1457$% snipped-for-privacy@newsfe07.lga...
Reply to
Petem

Our prayers go out to you and your family Joe..... Be strong.

Norm Mugford

I choose Polesoft Lockspam to fight spam, and you?

formatting link

Reply to
Norm Mugford

I will pray for you and your family.

Reply to
Don

My son's obituary was in the paper to day.

formatting link
If you would like to see what a special person he was please look at the guest book and photo album.

I guess I just want everyone to know what a rare soul he truly was.

Joe

Reply to
JoeRaisin

You must be very proud to have raised a son who touched so many people in such a good way, Joe.

Regards, Robert

Reply to
Robert L Bass

Joe, I am sorry to hear this, my thoughts and prayers are with you.

James B

Reply to
J Barnes

Cabling-Design.com Forums website is not affiliated with any of the manufacturers or service providers discussed here. All logos and trade names are the property of their respective owners.